Last week I was humbled.
No, not like "I'm such a humble person."
I did something wrong, and totally had to humble myself and ask for forgiveness.
I spoke to someone at work harshly, and I shouldn't have. I had to go tell them I was wrong, and ask for forgiveness. But I am fortunate, because she was sweet to me, and everything is alright now.
Then, I had to apologize again. I had talked to our Assistant Principal about something, and gotten all upset that several of us weren't told about a situation.
Well. It turns out that the information we had was wrong, and we never needed to be told. I had to tell her I was sorry, and that my information was wrong, and that I should have checked it out before getting all irritable with her. She also was very gracious, and said I could talk to her any time. I do believe that. I believe that I CAN talk to her anytime, and if she has any answers she will give them.
But I also know that I jumped the gun, and should have checked out that information before assuming that we were slighted.
Doesn't it always seem like things are clicking along great, and then a stick is thrown in your bicycle tire, and you end up gym-pants over tennis shoes on the ground? Then you have to regroup. That's what I felt like last week. Like I had to regroup. Like I was not a very good person. Like I am a big mess.
But you see, I am a big mess. I am human, and make mistakes just like everyone. Just because I have a low tolerance for mistakes doesn't mean that I don't ever make them.
I guess the lesson from last week is to think before you speak. Lesson learned. For now. I'm sure I will have this problem again, but I'm thankful that I am flexible enough to learn lessons. That I can learn from my mistakes. That I am able to humble myself and apologize.
I used to pray for flexibility, and I guess this is the answer to those prayers. Thank you God, for loving me enough to teach me and make me a better person.
Can it not be so painful next time???