Saturday, August 15, 2009

the race, the prize, the finish

OK, just want to say first off that I totally stole this URL (and changed it just a little) from a radio station morning show. Just had to get that off my chest.

But, I thought that randomness was a good way to describe my life. It seems that life comes at me (all of us?) in a random sort of way. This may be due to my healthy love of movies, and desire to see everything work in a "scripted" way and have a happy ending. But, as we all know, life just doesn't work that way.

I feel like life works in cycles. My current cycle is now on the upswing. You see, I am a teacher. So this time of year always feels like the beginning of a marathon. You've seen them on TV: there's 15,000 people in one place, all clumped up at the start of the marathon, and most of them are trim and dressed in appropriate athletic attire. Then the air horn goes off, (LOVE that sound) and everyone surges ahead in great anticipation of the next couple hours, with their eye firmly on the finish line.

Though I am neither trim, nor appropriately dressed in athletic clothes, I feel like the air horn just went off. The school year is about to begin, and I'm surging forward along with everyone else feeling quite a bit overwhelmed. To make a point, yesterday I cried in the supermarket. Because there was a MINOR problem in checking out. What is wrong with me?????? My brain knows that was irrational, but somehow my emotions didn't get the message, and let loose.

Anyway, can I just tell you that I cannot even conceive of the finish line right now, much less have my eye on the prize? I actually have my eye on the Valium...

But I have hope. Hope that this school year will be good. Hope that this school year will eventually be over. Hope that this school year will be better than last! Hope that I will be able to sleep soon, without waking up in the middle of the night thinking about lesson plans.

The summer was great, and I have hope that the rest of the year will be also. Many thanks to you friends and co-workers that will make it that way.

Much love, K

2 comments:

  1. I laughed when I read the part about waking up in the middle of the night thinking about lesson plans...or how about waking up in the middle of the night and having songs from your upcoming performance going through your head! Agh--the life of a music teacher. ;) I hope you have a great start to the year!

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